OK, I've though long and hard about this (for a few minutes anyway) ...
and have narrowed it down to my personal most hated top 5 footballers of all time ...
Fifth Place
John Terry ...
he should be ashamed and embarrassed for potentially destroying the harmony in the England dressing room and screwing what slim chances we have of winning this years World Cup, as well as a team mates girlfriend!
Being a Cock is bad
Being a Cock and Screwing your mate's girlfriend is very bad!
Being a Cock and Screwing your mates girlfriend AND possible England's chances of glory is unforgiveable!
Fourth Place
Eric Cantona ...
because he is a True French Arrogant Cock and played for the wankers at Old Trafford.
Being French is bad.
Being French and a Cock is expected - but very fucking bad.
Being French and a Cock AND playing for ManUre is just unfuckingforgiveable !
But - that kung-fu kick did make me giggle even though he can shove his seagulls up his arse!
But unbelievably there are worse offenders - so only No 4 for Le Manc Cock-Frog.
But unbelievably there are worse offenders - so only No 4 for Le Manc Cock-Frog.
Diego Maradonna ...
yep this is the cock believe it or not ...
Too much Corned Beef and Cocaine eh fatso?
Why? Duh !!
Being Argentinian is very bad.
Being Argentinian and a Cock is expected - but very very fucking bad.
Being Argentinian and a Cock AND a CHEATING GREASY DAEGO WOP MOTHER-FUCKER is reason enough for us to invade mainland Argentina, ban all corned beef and add Argentina to the Axis of Evil for all eternity !Enough said !
Second Place
Cristiano Ronaldo ...
an uber arrogant cock and an ex-ManUre scumbag of the highest level !
Being Portuguese isn't that bad by itself. Look at Mourinho. He's cool
Being Portuguese and an Uber Cock though is fucking bad - very very fucking bad.
Being Portuguese and an Uber Cock ex ManUre Scum though is really fucking bad - very very really fucking bad.
Being Portuguese and an Uber Cock ex ManUre Scum though is really fucking bad - very very really fucking bad.
Being Portuguese and an Uber Cock ex ManUre Scum AND a FUCKING CHEAT is a fucking diabolical liberty!!
Being Portuguese and an Uber Cock ex ManUre Scum AND a FUCKING CHEAT THAT KNOCKS ENGLAND OUT OF THE WORLD CUP is an instantly SHOOT ON FUCKING SIGHT FUCKING OFFENCE !!
Ronaldo conspires to get Roon The Loon sent off.
Why didn't Rooney twat him as he was going off anyway? Looks like he was thinking about it!
Maybe Portugal should be added to the Axis of Evil as penance for breeding such a knob?!
THE WINNER
Gary Fucking Neville ...
The most annoying cock sucking arrogant twat ever seen in a ManUre shirt !!
That's saying something considering he beats every other annoying cock sucking arrogant twat in a ManUre shirt for this title hands down!
Being an Fucking Arrogant Uber Cock Sucker is bad.
Being an Fucking Arrogant Uber Cock Sucker and a ManUre player is very very very fucking ridiculously astronomically bad.
Being an Fucking Arrogant Uber Cock Sucker and a ManUre player with the worst fucking whining attitude in the whole fucking world is absolutely a capital fucking shoot me now and fucking kill me unfuckingforgivable offence.
BEING GARY FUCKING NEVILLE IS THE FUCKING ULTIMATE FUCKING SHAME !!!!
I fucking hate him .. a lot ! A very fucking lot !!
Fucker !!!
(The Wanker Himself on hearing he made Number One on my hate list)
The Winning Fucking Arrogant Uber Cock Sucker consoles the Second placed Uber Arrogant Cock
Discuss :)
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awwww is that your baby pic Ghostrider?Soooo....erm.....angry looking lol
ReplyDeleteFootball schmutball!!!! Not being a follower of the game I can't really comment. However, I do feel compelled to make some comment due to your slanderous remarks against the most wonderful being to have blessed us with his presence in our country! I did see this particular incident your refering to that involved Shrek and God. Only for a brief moment, a nano second, did my undying, death defying love for Christiano wain. You can continue to slander him until a great cataclysm strikes this green and pleasant land...but there is no doubting that Christiano Ronaldo has been and still is; one of the most gifted and talented footballers this country has ever had the honour of his little studded footi boots playing on their hallowed turf.
Not only that he's well HOT!
(In me bestest Rolf Harris accent) Can you guess who it is yet?????
No I don't know who you are - but I believe you should take yourself outside and give yourself a damn good talking to. No denying he is a good footballer but he is obviously an arrogant, selfish twat who would prefer playing with someone's tackle than actually tackiling someone. English football is better without him - he is a pig headed knob who deserves to be shot, by dawn for crimes against his sexuality.
ReplyDeleteOh, welcome and keep up the rather poor comments!!!
Dear Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteYou sound like someone born and bred from a dark cave on the dark-side of the Pennines (the east).
I admit this is one of my earliest child photos, taken when my bottle of Stella was replaced with a plastic beaker of milk. One was not amused !
Your blasphemous remarks about calling the Portuguese Uber Cock "God" will be reported to those in power (ie us lot) and dealt with accordingly. Sentencing is normally swift and harsh and carried out with extreme prejudice - especially for such heinous crimes.
He may be talented when he is not cheating - but he will always be an Arrogant Uber Cock that is in desperate need of termination.
I agree with BB that English football is better off without him, which is a fact backed up in that cheating in the Premiership has diminished since he departed for Real Paella.
On a separate subject - there has been criticism of my choice for 5th place from Artillery Bloke (BB) ... and I am expecting the same from RMP Bloke later in the week. Here is my explanation ...
The Great Philandering Cock was chosen because he pissed me off in potentially upsetting the balance of the England team in such an important year.
Had it not been for the World Cup, then the "Great Uber Trog Cock" Ryan Giggs would have been placed at number 5 for being Welsh, a ManUre player and having the sheer fucking cheek to win BBC Sports "Personality" Of 2009 - how exactly he achieved that I will never ever know !
ok I'm back...having just spoken to myself Breakfast Bloke and naaaa I still think the same haha
ReplyDeleteConfidence can sometimes be misconstrued as arrogance....as I'm sure we all know more than one person that falls in to this category....I am under oath not to reveal any names or a swift and harsh punishment would be carried out with extreme prejudice - especially for such heinous crimes!
Yep - damn right !! pmsl.
ReplyDeleteI note with regret though that you haven't - yet - repented for your blasphemous remarks !
Seeing as a word with yourself didn't work - perhaps you should Head Shrink yourself? A scary prospect but I'm sure deep down there is intelligent life there somewhere ;)
Head Shrink myself?? I don't understand. What is a head shrink? (Denial - hopefully this might throw him off the scent!!)
ReplyDeleteI will never NEVER repent...you will never brow beat me in to submission with your narcissitical manner.
And your envy of this wonderful, talented being is ooooh so evident!!
Watch him and weep Ghostrider lol
It's official ... you have officially lost the plot ! Assuming you ever had the plot in thefirst place that is !!
ReplyDeleteRepent Sinner ! Repent !
Or go to a Priest and confess your sin there ?!
I trust a priest less than some one from the RAF...and that's saying something!!!
ReplyDeleteSo thanks for the advice G...but I think I'll decline your offer of assistance on this one!