Pigeons! What fucking use do they provide !
Let's face it ... what have pigeons ever done for us ?!
Maybe they provide some fun for saddos that race them ... (the flat capped freaky type that hail from Yorkshire maybe ... whilst pouring gravy over their chips)
Apart from that - why in hell do they exist ?
They crap on everything ... like the French
They smell ... like the French
They're fucking useless ... like the French
Maybe they are all fucking French ?!
(PROOF ! A fucking French Pigeon !)
These fuckers are obviously made in France and sent here as a stealth weapon to annoy the crap out of us by crapping on us!
It seems to me that this is the only feasible answer ...
... to declare genocide on pigeons ... and the fucking French !
or ...
... better still ...
Do we need a better reason ?
AU REVOIR LES FROGGIES !! ... and take your fucking pigeons with you !
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Oh dear, how little your brain is. Do you not know that the Pigeon actually originates from Russia? They were developed as a means of spying on there newly acquired lands and people after the Second World War. Since the sudden influx of Eastern Europeans, the Russians have armed them with the white, sticky stuff and sent them over here, to our fair land, because this is where most of the eastern europeans are!!!!!
ReplyDeleteWell - yes and no.
ReplyDeleteThis highlights a problem with the resurgent Russian military - in their quest to conquer all things non-commie.
Now we have the Pole Dancing Tribes invading our shores that is obviously a contributing factor why we are seeing an increase in Pigeon shit - but - it was the French who invented the pigeon so that they could get their shit out of France (they used to get delayed due to the Air Traffic & transport strikes, port blockades etc)and into Britain.
New motto ... keep Britain Tidy - kill a Frog & A Pigeon?
Wait! Stop! Hang on a minute! Tribes of Pole Dancers? Fuck the pigeons - where Pole Dancer???
ReplyDeleteCrap! Good point! I'm off looking for them ...
ReplyDelete... hey wait!
You wanna fuck the pigeons now as well ?!?!
They are rather nice in a shortcrust pastry case with some gravy
ReplyDeleteNo....and you cant lick them - they are a lot harder to catch than puppys
ReplyDeleteNow your talking But gravy???? Waste of a dead cooked pigeon if you ask me
ReplyDeleteHave you ever tried licking a pigeon AB?
ReplyDeleteNo, why? Is it difficult?
ReplyDeleteWell ... if the pigeon is flying at the time you attempt to lick it - then yes it is very fucking difficult!
ReplyDeleteIt's even tricky for us types that are used to air-to-air refuelling type manoeuvres (although I don't recommend you try licking the fuel boom - it tastes bleedin 'awful and you get flies in your eyes !) so the Artillery would be in big trouble methinks.
Probably better off waiting till it's stationary on a statue and then surprising it from behind !
ps Just be carefull when attempting to lick the behind bit - as that part is very active on a pigeon ...
ReplyDelete... remember that they are French and so are consequently full of shit! The taste will obviously be the same!